Saturday, September 30, 2006

Valentines Day: The Socio economic effect. by Maina pyaarkiya

We all know that recently there was a decision taken by the government to dissolve the Lok Sabha early by February 6th. Opposition and all other Partygoers blamed it on the upcoming election campaign and a lack of confidence on part of the government. But recently,(since they now have nothing better to do) Tehelka revealed that there is actually a secret reason many of us have ignored. If you haven’t guessed it by now then it is (yes now you get it!) Valentine’s Day on February 14th.
Now, a major political decision and Valentine’s Day may not seem to have anything in common, but government analysts have predicted that if the government stayed in power till that date then it might have had adverse effects on their election campaign. How, you ask? Well, some insiders say that the fact that our prime minister is a bachelor might have had some serious repercussions in the season where love is in the air and result in a lack of votes from the youth.
Actually, in light of this major-decision, it has become imperative to analyse the significance of this day from a socio-economic perspective. While to most of us it is mainly about ‘going round and round’ with someone, many people do not ignore the importance of the actual message that St. Valentine tried to convey. Love has no borders; so on this day people display their deepest love towards their wives, husbands, parents, sisters, bosses, secretaries,dhobis and pets. Amazon was recently seen tapping the pet market by selling gift-wrapped cans of salmon or dog biscuits with free pet-cards, to show them how much you care!
Also, celebrities and other such popular species of humanity don’t ignore this event; all of them displaying their love for each other. Recent displays have been George Bush to Saddam Hussein (though George is still wailing over his lost love Osama), Michael Jackson to 12 year old kids, Britney Spears to Madonna, Pervez Mussharaf to his Kursi, Indian batting for the Australian bowling (and vice-versa) and Laloo Yadav to his idealistic Governor. Lalooji was quoted as saying, "I loving my state too much,that is why I keeping it family affair. So what if there being corruption? All fair is love and war! So Governor sahib don’t feel jealousy! Isme Bhi Aupposition Kaa Haath Hain! "
Economists predict that this love hysteria will step up economic reforms in the country. Valentine’s day will help start-up the music industry battling desperately against piracy, as lot of those ‘Lubby-dubby, Have I told you lately’ albums hit stores now. No comments could be received ‘on record’ regarding this matter from the piracy industry executives, but they add that fikar-not bootlegged versions by Sadaf Stereo will soon be available.
Also, this event is expected to give a major boost to the agro-based sector as the flower (and subsequently the fertiliser) sales will go up drastically. Youth organizations like the DUSU have recommended application of the MRTP Act on the numerous phoolwallas, as they will attempt to hike their prices and exploit the hapless youngsters.
But there are some political parties who are wholeheartedly opposing this event. Shiv sena is known to have issued a notice saying that if such an unconstitutional and phirangi festival is to be celebrated then they’ll dig up each and every street of Maharashtra (this is in light of their successful digging-up of cricket pitches a few years ago). On hearing this statement the Ambanis were delighted and immediately decided to undertake a gas-line project in Maharashtra, as Shiv Sena would definitely cut down their pipe-laying and digging costs.
Health experts are concerned too, considering the number of chocolates that will be sold and the amount of worms that have been found in them recently. They predict over-consumption of chocolates will lead to obesity, diabetes and loose-motions in young people. Most common (and perhaps the most drastic) fear is the rise in population by November 14th this year.
But then the government is happy as love is in the air and it will further add to their already inflated feel good factor. It’s all about feeling good, eh!
Personally, I am a believer in stability of relationships and the everlasting power of love, thus I made an extremely taxing resolution this new year’s eve: that I shall I have only one new valentine every year.
Optimists say that if this love fever prevailing around February 14th continues to grow every year then India will definitely be a superpower by 2020. So all you young lovebirds ask that female or male bird out, (one that’s been chirping at a Barista or a CCD near you) you’ll be doing your country a great favour. India Shining!

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